As you all appreciate, lying is not very welcome; However, it should not be forgotten that not all lies are told under equal conditions and do not have the same effect. There are small, harmless lies that do no harm to the one being told or being told, and there are big lies that have dire consequences.
You’ve probably heard the terms ‘pathological liar’ and ‘compulsive liar’ used for people who often lie. These two terms are used interchangeably as if they were synonyms; but they actually have different meanings. Clinical psychologist Dr. Ramani Durvasula explained the difference between these two terms in an interview with Well+Good.
Difference between pathological and compulsive liar
Both pathological and compulsive lying are told out of habit, which can make it extremely difficult to determine whether anything a person says is truly true or contains some degree of false information. Also, both types of lies can often be defensive or coping mechanisms that a person develops in response to a traumatic event in early childhood.
However, apart from these, there are important differences between pathological and compulsive lying. According to Durvasula, pathological lying; it involves manipulation of the person to avoid blame and get out of trouble, and it usually consists of more than one lie. Durvasula explains this as creating “an elaborate web of lies to gain some personal gain.” Stating that pathological liars are often unaware of how their behaviors affect others and cannot empathize, Durvasula said that this condition tends to coexist with narcissistic personality disorder; however, he underlines that this is not always the case.
Compulsive lying, on the other hand, is often told without any concrete reason, out of habit, and usually does not have any bad consequences. Stating that compulsive liars lie in low or no risk situations, Durvasula says these lies are mostly simple things like pretending you went on a vacation you didn’t go to or lying about what you watched on TV last night. These kind of little lies make compulsive liars feel comfortable and familiar.
The type of lie, its purpose, and how often it is told matter.
According to Durvasula, what matters in pathological and compulsive lying isn’t just how often they lie: Just as important are the purpose of the person and the type of lie. “When these little lies become the norm, and also involve more vile, big lies, the issue turns more specifically into deception and mistrust,” Durvasula says.
When your trust in someone starts to wane, you may need to reconsider your relationship with them, whether it’s a coworker, romantic partner, family member, friend, or something else. For situations like these, Durvasula advises, “If you’re dealing with any high-risk information that you need to be sure is accurate, make sure you get the confirmation of that intelligence from someone else.”
Finally, Durvasula; He states that if you catch someone lying—especially if that person is a pathological liar—it wouldn’t be wise to confront them about it. If you do, the liar will most likely get defensive and start denying everything; He will lie upon lie. So it would be best for you to use your time and energy to seek the truth elsewhere.
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